Whatever happened to hiring a human – a living, breathing person? Companies are so focused on saving time and money, that they utilize software that hires a resume and not a human. What kind of company are you that you care more about a fucking resume than the person behind it?
Wait a minute. It’s all coming together. It’s starting to make sense. I get it!
Resumes = robots.
Companies don’t want human beings working for them, they want robots. Robots are malleable. Robots are cheap. Robots don’t disagree or challenge or think creatively. Robots just do. Hence, the software.
Ho. Lee. Shit.
I’m a little nauseous with this revelation. I’m disgusted and disappointed.
Humans have ideas, personalities, debates, opinions, discussions, creativity, disagreements, excitement, passion. Resumes have words. Robots repeat words.
Brilliant cousin and I would both take less money to work for a company that values humans. Killer company culture, employee acknowledgement, creative empowerment – those are the perks worth working for.
Free soda? Ping pong? Foosball? Lunch on Fridays? Who gives a flying fuck?
Robots do. Robots will thrive in your company, because robots love a good game of foosball and a free Diet Coke.
Congratulations “fuck you and your pathetic resume” software companies and the organizations that employ you. You win.
But do you really?
In six months you’re going to realize that something is off. You’ll wonder what’s happening to the culture at your company. You’ll wonder what’s happening to productivity. You’ll wonder what’s happening to customer service.
You’ll wonder where you went wrong.
Disdain. That’s what I have for these companies. Pure, unadulterated disdain. Disdain dragged me to the basement. Twice. Don’t go for three, Beatrice. (See The Beginning.)